ramblings of a slightly crazy person.
Mar. 17th, 2012 09:06 pmEvery card reading I have done since Christmas has had the card that indicates a move to a new home or place of work. So I'm thinking I may be moving again come the end of July. If that's the case, I'm really hoping to move to Taira! Everything is in Taira! Shopping malls, movie theatres, restaurants, the library, the B.O.E., my Japanese Teacher... It would be so convenient! I would only have to take a train if I want to visit a friend somewhere else! I'm fine with staying in Yotsukura too because I really love 2 of my schools and I like the other 2 just fine as well. If I move then I will probably be changing schools again and I'm not sure how I feel about that.
I've also had the card telling me to admit my true feelings to myself. Now that threw me for a loop because I have no idea what I am feeling in regards to anything.
Dietary Change has also come up quite frequently and I am stumped with how to acomplish that. I eat vegetables and fruit every day. I eat what is available (onions, garlic, green beans, bell peppers, brocoli, carrots and daikon radish). I eat mostly rice, but sometimes potatos. and I often eat chicken, steak or hamburger (beef). lunch is whatever is provided by the school (which is crap since the earthquake and tsunami destroyed half of the lunch centres in the area) and an apple and crunchy peanut butter I bring from home. breakfast is bran and fruit cereals with toast and a banana. I also take vitamins to supliment my meals.
I'm really not sure what else to do.
In the very last reading I did, just yesterday, I received the messages that there is a smoother road ahead with peace and tranquility and that I am protected from all types of harm as well as the worst is now behind me and it's ok to feel safe and relax.
It seems like as much as I want to relax and feel safe, I am not sure how to do it. I've been on edge for a year constantly waiting for the next earthquake and we had 2 just 4 days ago. I don't even realize that I'm stressed until the tension breaks. Usually I don't even think about it. Then out of the blue I'll get this feeling like we're going to have a quake and about 80 percent of the time, we do. The other 20 percent of the time I sit tense all evening waiting for something that doesn't happen..or maybe did happen but was so small or far away that I didn't notice it.
And yet, despite all the crap and not so nice stuff of the last year, I really can't see myself being anywhere else. This is where I want to be, so shouldn't I just suck it up and get on with life? Not that I complain 24/7 or even feel stressed all the time. I don't even know what I feel and maybe that is part of the problem.
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On a completely different note, I asked my friends on fb if one or two of them would send me some chocolate. I got six offers. So I'm quite happy with that. The first package came yesterday. Instead of the small (1 or 2 little packs of easter eggs etc.) that I was expecting, I got 3 kg of cadburry mini eggs and mini easter eggs! 3KG!!! as far as I know I still have another 4 or 5 packages coming from different people. I will definitely be sharing!
Thank you for the chocolate! You know who you are! wow.